Volvo S80: Svenskarna Är Pimps Too

We are flat-out impressed by Volvo’s premium luxury offering, the 2009 Volvo S80 – those Swedes have really stepped up to the plate where the American standard of luxury is concerned. In fact, we’d even go so far as to assert that the Volvo S80 completely outperforms other sedans in its class like the BMW 5-series and the Audi A6.

We test drove the floor model, a 2009 Volvo S80 V8, and by the time we had driven the first half-mile, we were this close to making a break for the border and living a life on the lamb – that’s how in love we are with the new S80.
One of it’s most striking features by far is its handling, the ride is smoother than glass. Although that may not seem like such an impressive feat for a luxury sedan, you have to remember that all the extra safety features Volvo is notorious for adding to their cars usually makes for pretty stiff handling. Leaving their “safety over style” mentality light-years behind them, the Volvo S80 V8 also comes with optional 18″ chrome rims and a 20% window tint, providing for not only a smooth ride, but a sick one too.

So let’s say you buy an S80 and you’re in love with your new whip, but you’re nervous about leaving it alone in the parking lot while you’re up in the club. Well don’t be, because Volvo thought of that. Standard on the S80 V8 and optional on both the S80 3.2 and S80 T6, Volvo’s Personal Car Communicator [PCC] provides every theft-deterrent short of trunk-stored Dobermans. The PCC acts as a two-way radio between you and your car, keeping you constantly aware of when your car is locked or unlocked, and – for when you aren’t within earshot – whether the alarm has been activated or not. If the alarm has been activated, the PCC communicates with the Volvo S80′s Heart Beat Sensor and will notify you as to exactly how many individuals are in the vehicle and where they are seated. After you waste the punks, the S80′s front and rear park-assist cameras as well as Blind Spot Information System will allow you to easily navigate your way out of the parking lot while 311-hp V8 engine will help put some distance between you and the responding 5-0.

Fully bagged out, the S80 goes for about 50k, a lot less than the Germans would try and squeeze out of you for the same luxuries. Bottom line: in the words of the late Notorious BIG “Only pimpin’ hoes drive Volvos.”

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